Saturday, April 16, 2011

Customer Stories from April 2011

It always baffles me why customers will call on their mobiles, then complain they have no credit and ask if we can we call them back.

It’s simple guys, if you don’t want to use your mobile phone credit, then don’t call on your mobile phone!

Here are a few customer stories from the last week or two…


Customer rambling to me: “I have the bill here, do I? Oh! No, I don’t… I thought I had it… oh, here it is. I thought I’d left it on the kitchen table. I was pretty sure. I think I brought it out yesterday because I knew I’d be calling you. Ok. I’ve got the account and it’s got an account no. Do you want the account no?”

I wanted to say “oh no please, it’s such a pleasure to hear you having a conversation with yourself. By all means, continue. I’m even taking notes!”


As I write this, it’s the 8th of April. I just had a customer who called up angry because he’d received an overdue notice when he claimed the account had been paid.

I checked his account… No, there hadn’t been a payment come through...

“Well it has been paid” he insisted loudly “and I’ve got the rcpt right here!

“When was it paid?” I asked as it usually takes a day or two to hit the account.

“I’ve got the rcpt and it says right here on the 17th of April that I paid $400”

I confirmed the date with him again and then said “and do you realise that today is on the 8th and you’re telling me you paid this in eleven days time?”

And believe it or not, he didn’t acknowledge his error but changed the subject to his next gripe…


There’s a time and place for protracted stories.

If you’re watching a movie, then it’s a good thing! If you’re reading a novel, it’s essential! If you’re calling up your energy provider, it absolutely NOT required!

I recently had a guy call to tell me how many burners he uses when he cooks his breakfast, then how many when he cooks his lunch.

This was because he’d discovered a hissing sound coming from his burner, indicating that gas was escaping. He couldn’t smell any gas and promptly turned the burner off… but wanted to call to ask if it was going to be safe to use the burner the following day…. Oh, and he’d opened all the doors and windows as well which was a bit of a sacrifice for him because he has arthritis and the cold air made his condition flare up…

Along the same lines, I had another customer who ummed and ahhhed for about 40 long seconds while he was thinking about whether he called a certain supplier last Monday or Friday. I had to bite my tongue because I really wanted to say “It doesn’t make a fricken bit of difference to this situation that you rang your supplier, let alone what DAY you did it on!!”

Remember, if you want good fast efficient service when calling a utility company, less is more. Let them ask the questions and only answer what you’ve been asked!

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